Here are many examples of the unhelpful advice that is cookie-cutter “marriage advice” that abused women get from counselors and friends who don’t understand abuse (and is pretty shallow even for a non-abusive marriage.)
If you hear this kind of advice, run the other direction, read my blog, and find help from someone who understands abuse!
There are serious problems, lies, and deceptions in the church that are undermining its ability to represent Christ and fulfill His intentions. These deceptions create much of the spiritual abuse that abused Christian are subjected to. Four of those problems severely impact abused women of faith: bible mistranslations, misogyny, power and the hierarchy church structure, and a refusal to define evil from God’s perspective.
Read More“God allows abuse to happen for a reason” “God is in control of everything (and therefore, everyone)” “God suffered, so you need to suffer too” “Because God is faithful, He will heal your marriage”
Have you heard these lies from Christians when you’ve tried to get help with your emotionally abusive marriage? It’s time to look at the misinformation and brainwashing we’ve been subjected to about who God is.
Read More“The man is the head of the household and your covering.” “You need to respect your husband no matter what.” “We are all sinners.” “He’s a Christian.”
Let’s look at the common teachings about husbands that create an atmosphere that promotes and justifies abuse.
Read More“Marriage is not meant to make you happy, it’s meant to make you holy.” “God hates divorce.” “Marriage is a sacred oath, till death do us part.” “You have to save the marriage, even if you’re the only one trying.” “You need marriage counseling.” “It’s bad for the kids to leave because they need a father.”
Covertly abused women of faith are torn to shreds over having to get a divorce and it’s an agonizing decision that no woman takes lightly. We stick with our marriages for years and years past the point of hope. We pay for that with our emotional and mental well-being, and our physical health. And these are some lies that have kept us in this bondage.
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